Every so often they line my cage with newspaper, and if I’m lucky it is the readers letter page.

Over the years I have seen a high number of people writing in and moaning about how teachers are so lucky to have such an easy job. They start at 8:50 and finish mid afternoon plus have so much time off during the year including 6 weeks in the summer! How hard can it be looking after a few children for a couple of hours?

The beauty of free speech is that it allows those who have no idea about the truth to make wild comments and make themselves look more stupid than a hamster (hang on! I think I just insulted myself.) As a hamster I have never driven a lorry (legs too short to reach the pedals) nor have I ever been offered a job as a surgeon (could not afford…